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My dear friend, Beth, just entered one of life’s greatest stages: She became a first-time grandmother on the eve of her 72nd birthday. Of course, the first question everyone asks her upon hearing the blessed news is: “What is the baby going to call you?”
“Grandma,” she proudly tells them. Beth is incredulous over the reaction of so many of her friends. They are surprised she would choose such an old-fashioned moniker. Some are even dismissive.
Beth’s friends consider the name Grandma to be too old-fashioned and thus it makes her seem so old. Beth is dismissive back: “I am old, and ecstatic to be ‘Grandma’ — it’s a badge of honor.”
Grandmother and grandma, time-honored sobriquets for women, seem to have fallen out of favor in recent years. In a survey of popular grandparent names conducted by Preply, a service that matches people with language tutors, grandma didn’t even crack the top six names.
Perhaps it was just predictable that baby boomers, whose anthem is Bob Dylan’s ballad, Forever Young, would buck tradition for reasons of vanity and rebellion, which have marked this cohort since its inception.
Marla Paul can relate. This petite boomer and Instagram fashion influencer became a grandmother to a baby boy in late July. She absolutely refuses any traditional appellations such as granny, grandma or bubbe, the Yiddish word for grandmother popular for Jewish grandparents.
Paul has been pondering what she wanted to be called for the nine months since she learned her daughter was pregnant.
She knew the names of her own grandmothers, bubbe, would never do. “There are no good associations for me,” she says. "To me, it says stern, old-fashioned, Russian immigrant’.”
Paul wanted an appellation that felt like her. Even two weeks after her grandson was born, she still hadn’t decided on a name that felt like her, but she narrowed down the list. “It’s down to Mommo and Lulu,” says the San Diego resident.
Sometimes picking your own grandparent name can backfire.
When Lori Irvine learned she was going to become a grandmother, the youthful Californian, 58 at the time, was thrilled — though did not want a name that reflected her mature age. When asked what her grandchild would call her, she said, “Cousin Lori.” She was kidding, not kidding, as the kids say on social media.
Irvine instead chose for herself the name Lolly. Unfortunately, as it turns out, this is not an easy name for children beginning to talk to pronounce. Her grandson and granddaughter, born a year later, came up with their own name for her, one that was easy to say. They called her, Baboo, much to her chagrin. Today, those two grandchildren are four and five, and when they want to get a rise out of her, they purposely call her Baboo. (Though, she is still Lolly — and the kids can now pronounce it!)
To Shelley Rosen, a grandmother is “someone with gray hair who wears a housecoat all day.” That definitely is the antithesis of Ms. Rosen, a dark-haired, stylish, high-energy Texan. Her own mother died when she was young, so she didn’t have a role model for herself. But she chose wisely. Her friend’s mother was the kind of grandmother who would bring a lamb chop over for her grandchild’s lunch and was always up for an adventure. The grandkids called her “Honey” and that’s the name Shelley Rosen picked for herself.
“I personally object to people picking names because they are easy to say, like YaYa,” Rosen says. “As the kids grow up, trust me, your grandchild will learn to talk.”
I am a big fan of tradition when it comes to all things family. When my first grandson was born, I wanted to be called Grammy Ann or Grammy Annie, which I admit sounds like a brand of cookie. My children called their grandmothers, Grammy Ruth and Grammy Jeanette.
My son and daughter-in-law suggested I pick something easier for a toddler to say, like Gigi. That’s what I went with and it turns out I am an unwitting trendsetter. Gigi is the most popular name on the Preply survey, followed by Nana, Mimi, Gran, Bibi and Momo.
Truth be told, every time my two grandsons, ages five and three, call me Gigi in person or on Facetime — my heart swells. It never gets old. At the age of 68, I feel Gigi’s timeless and it suits me — aging on the outside, young at heart.
Being a grandmother is exhilarating and (can be) exhausting No matter what we’re called, those of us lucky enough to have grandchildren feel the same: It is a badge of honor and deep good fortune to arrive at this stage where we get to be Grandma, Gigi, Yaya or Bubbe.
Who out there is a grandmother? What do YOUR grandkids call you? Let us know in the comments below.
Ethel Staff
Follow Article Topics: Relationships
