Are you an older woman who likes to travel — or who would like to travel more? Then join our Ethel On-The-Go group today. It's very special!
Margaritas were being poured poolside, prompting our neighbor’s adult daughter to compare our community to a college campus. It’s a common remark and an observation I’ve made during our first year here.
My husband, Billy, and I live in a 55-plus development in Delaware, named Independence for its colonial theme. We relocated from Long Island four years ago to be close to the Atlantic beaches, not far from family and a nicer life. Little did we know how much we would enjoy our new life!
The most obvious similarity between residents and college students is a penchant for partying. Frat parties have been replaced with clubhouse Friday night Happy Hours.
Unlike yesteryear, when wild was the norm in the dorm, we now drink and assess with caution if another Old Fashioned will trigger A-fib. (Can Benefiber Martinis be far behind?) And though we need to pee more often than our college-age counterparts, it doesn’t thwart our enthusiasm for late-night gatherings.
Both groups, college kids and us older kids, have left home and revel in the camaraderie of new friendships that may last a lifetime. Instead of dorm rooms, it’s state-of-the-art houses on manicured grounds. A cozy Coastal Grandma vibe permeates the open concept layouts (think Nancy Meyers’ films), with space to chill and chat, eliciting an “always-welcome” atmosphere, much like college dorms.
A wanderlust for group travel is another common denominator, though nowadays river cruising beats backpacking. The Douro, Danube, Rhine. Tours of Yellowstone, Grand Teton, Banff. Whether it’s eight of us, like our Las Vegas/Grand Canyon trip, or 30+ that cruised the Caribbean, there’s a trip on the horizon.
Yet, it’s great to get home again for more group activities.
Similar to frat houses, block parties build camaraderie, turning neighbors into friends. This summer, our street hosted a Jimmy Buffet celebration. Over 50 parrot-heads dressed in island attire, enjoyed cheeseburgers in paradise and grilled shrimp and other goodies.
Summertime in Indy, the nickname we have given our residence, is sublime. Plenty of pool parties with bands playing and the clubhouse serving pub grub and beverages poolside. Music, mingling and chilling — like the best of our college days. In the pool, I let the current take me on my float, drifting by pods of conversations, the sun glinting off sunglasses on smiling faces. I hear snippets like this:
“…Bocce ball tournament is when?…”
“…That book was excellent…”
“…A bunch of us ate at…”
“…We're playing pickleball tomorrow…”
Just as swimming pools are blank canvases until splashed with people, so too are pickleball courts — quiet and still until they erupt with players. As you know, our age group are some of the biggest fans of the sport.
Clubs are the fraternities. With approximately 130 enthusiasts, the Pickleball Club is among the most popular. That assortment includes clubs devoted to tennis, billiards, volleyball, anglers, gardening, theater, books, veterans and other groups that meet for poker and mah-jongg. Along with these meet-ups comes an abundance of new besties — and even some romance.
Judy moved here in 2019 and was widowed in 2021. After a decades long absence from the dating scene, encouraged by her Indy friends to get out there again, she met David online in February 2023. They’ve been seeing each other ever since.
But romance isn’t always perfect. Or easy. Peter has met women here in our community that he’s dated. “The problem is that Indy is a very close society, so if you meet someone, you likely share common interests with many residents,” he said. “Confidentiality is almost non-existent, and if/when things go South, it can be very messy.”
Similar to the heady brew of newfound independence and discoveries of college days — great literature, amazing music, new achievements — retirees are experiencing a new era, with time to invest and opportunities to pursue. Bucket lists become a reality here!
My husband Billy has become an artisan woodworker, creating deep-pour epoxy tables that are stunning pieces of art functioning as furniture. I published my first book after decades of articles and essays. My Manhattan book launch party was an amazing event, and Indy friends have been pillars of support at bookstore signings and book clubs.
Another popular passion? Cars. SUVs and sedans share space with vintage vehicles — Rich’s blue 1972 Chevelle and Herb’s cream-colored 1953 MG TD. Paul’s stable of antique vehicles includes a 1949 Buick Woody Wagon and a 1963 Thunderbird.
One of our most memorable nights was a summer beach bonfire, orchestrated by a company that handles permits, setup and cleanup. All we had to do was show up, and two dozen of us did. With our chairs circling the fire, and the sounds of laughter and ocean surf filling the air — we relaxed and settled in.
After witnessing a blazing masterpiece of a sunset, the darkened skies offered up another view — not just stars, but lines of light dashing across the sky. It looked like something out of Star Wars. Were we witnessing an invasion? Had we overserved cocktails?
Turns out it was the Starlink satellites, that orbit the earth in a train. It was magical watching the lights streak across the heavens. We gazed skyward in awe, listening to the waves crash and the fire crackle. Like freshmen arriving to new dorms and retirees relocating to new homes, we have all landed in places to pursue new dreams.
Paula Ganzi McGloin is an award-winning journalist and essayist whose work has appeared in The New York Times, Newsday and other publications. She blogs about life with an alcoholic and navigating widowhood at www.paulaganzimcgloin.com. McGloin is the author of Bottles in the Basement: Surviving an Alcoholic—a Memoir.
Photos: Courtesy Paula Ganzi McGloin
Would any of you live in a 55-plus community? Let us know in the comments below.
