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A new friend of mine says that she has vacationed with her family in the same place for 34 years, and has not changed her hairstyle since high school. I admire her consistency, and I’m all in favor of being steadfast and loyal. But once we know each other better, I’m going to give her some advice.
Try something different!
As we age, it’s common to prefer things that feel familiar. One of the great joys in life, though, involves change. New experiences send a message to our brains to wake up and pay attention. We feel excited and alive!
I recently took one of my grandchildren to visit an artist named Peter at his glassblowing studio. Peter told me that he’d recently had an 80-year-old woman with bad arthritis come to one of his workshops. She wanted to learn how to use the tools and craft a vase, so he helped her through the process, and she loved every minute of it. “When you’re excited, you can do anything,” Peter said.
Can you remember what you did two weeks ago on Tuesday? If it was a day like any other, you probably couldn’t provide any details. But if you found a new place to hike or took a grandchild for a special treat, it probably stands out. Everyday events tend to blur together. When our brains receive unfamiliar information, they encode the experiences differently. Those are the ones we are most likely to remember.
In one study published in Nature Neuroscience, researchers used GPS trackers to see where volunteers went each day, and they had them report on their moods. When people ventured out of their daily routines into varied locations and experiences, they felt more upbeat and animated, with a strong boost in happiness and well-being.
I thought about the power of new experiences when I went on a first-time trip recently to Portugal. I stayed in a city, a remote country retreat and a pretty vineyard — my brain registered every varied moment as new and exciting.
The value of exploring someplace new is just one element of what Meik Wining, head of the Happiness Research Institute in Denmark, calls “the importance of firsts.” When you do something for the first time, the memory sticks with you. You remember your first date, your first kiss and your child’s first steps far more vividly than all the ones that come after.
When Wining’s Institute did a global study asking people about happy memories, they found that “23 percent of the memories were novel or extraordinary experiences,” he writes in his book The Art of Making Memories. The results convinced him that “extraordinary days are memorable days.”
Relying on the power of firsts to animate our days is easy when we’re young — we have a whole world to explore. But as we get older, we’ve amassed a lifetime of new experiences. I used to make a list every year on my birthday of “10 Things I’ve Never Done.” In the beginning, it included things like getting married, becoming a mom, writing a bestseller and hiking in the Alps.
After a while, those got checked off and I tried to come up with new adventures. As the years have gone on, it often has felt like all the big things are behind me rather than ahead.
But that doesn’t mean I have to give up on having new experiences. None of us should. A study published in Scientific American reports that our brains continue to grow new neurons as we keep learning, at every age. In other words, our minds can continually get wake-up calls, throughout our lives.
Neuroscientist David Eagleman says that when you pack your days with new and different activities, time seems to slow down. New events make you pay attention, so you’re fully experiencing each day rather than simply drifting through. In a recent podcast with lifestyle guru Tim Ferris, Eagleman explained that "one of the most important things in life is seeking novelty and always putting yourself in new situations." Doing that, he said, helps you lay down rich memories so that "you won't necessarily live longer but you'll make it seem as if you've lived longer."
You don’t need to go skydiving to get the benefit of an energized body-brain circuit. Go to a farmer’s market and buy a fruit you’ve never seen before. Venture to a part of town where you don’t usually go. Anything that makes you happy and surprised in the moment improves your physical and mental health. Even small changes in your day can shake up the neural circuits and wake up the brain.
Other small changes can also keep one day from blurring into the next. Instead of taking the same route when you go to the grocery store or a friend’s house, find a new way to go each time. Or when you get to the store, walk down the aisles in the opposite than you usually do. You’ll be surprised at the new things you notice.
Last weekend, I decided to hop in the car and go somewhere I’d never been. I found a wildfowl conservancy and spent a happy afternoon amongst the ducks, swans, and cranes. The eye-opening discovery put me in a happy mood that lasted for days. The excitement of seeing something brand new sparks unexpected energy and lets us see the world with fresh eyes.
A few years ago, my husband and I sold the house where we’d raised our children and moved to a new city. I worried about uprooting our lives after 26 years, but being in a new place has made life feel fresh and exciting again. We’re happy here, but will we move again? I hope so. You’re never too old to create a new memory.
When was the last time you broke out of your comfort zone? Let us know in the comments below.
Luis Pinto
Follow Article Topics: Fulfillment
